Monthly Archives: March 2019

Awesome Biblical Quotes About Money

Category : Life Tips

photo credit; Anthony Abruzzo @anevab26 -unsplash

Money problems are probably the biggest complaint people have after health problems. Sometimes we are in so deep (with debt) that we figure there is no way out so we may as well live with it. We tell ourselves that it is a normal part of life, a necessary evil. After all, pretty much everyone we know has some kind of debt. There are reasons we get tripped up with money and never seem to have enough of it to pay our bills and climb our way out of debt.

Money management really comes down to our understanding of what money is – where it comes from and what it is for.

Quotes

(1) Whoever loves money never has enough; whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with their income. This too is meaningless. – Ecclesiastes 5:10

(2) Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law.- Romans 13:8

(3) Dishonest money dwindles away, but whoever gathers money little by little makes it grow.- Proverbs 13:11

(4) No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.- 6:24

(5) Lazy hands make for poverty, but diligent hands bring wealth. – Proverbs 10:4

(6) You say, ‘I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing.’ But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked.- Revelation 3:17

(7) Sell your possessions and give to the poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will never fail, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys. – Luke 12:33

(8) For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs. -I Timothy 6:10

(9) Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it?- Luke 14:28

(10) Wealth from get-rich-quick schemes quickly disappears; wealth from hard work grows over time.- Proverbs 13:11

(11) Work brings profit, but mere talk leads to poverty! – Proverbs 13:11

(12) If you love sleep, you will end in poverty. Keep your eyes open, and there will be plenty to eat! – Proverbs 20:13

(13) Those who love pleasure become poor; those who love wine and luxury will never be rich.- Proverbs 21:17

(14) Don’t wear yourself out trying to get rich. Be wise enough to know when to quit. – Proverbs 23:4

(15) Income from charging high-interest rates will end up in the pocket of someone who is kind to the poor. – Proverbs 28:8

(16) Trust in your money and down you go! But the godly flourish like leaves in spring. – Proverbs 11:28

(17) Give freely and become more wealthy; be stingy and lose everything.- Proverbs 11:24

(18) In the blink of an eye wealth disappears, for it will sprout wings and fly away like an eagle.- Proverbs 23:5

(19) There’s danger in putting up security for a stranger’s debt; it’s safer not to guarantee another person’s debt.- Proverbs 11:15

(20) It’s poor judgment to guarantee another person’s debt or put up security for a friend. – Proverbs 17:28

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Diana Lynne enjoys travel, self-improvement, pursuing a debt-free/financially free life. She also loves hanging out with family, friends and being with her dog Skye. Diana is a Quebec City girl. who loves living life.  You can connect with her through Livingandstuff.ca

 

 

 

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25 Quotes About Success

Category : Success

 

“The foundation stones for a balanced success are honesty, character, integrity, faith, love and loyalty.”Zig Ziglar

Success, of course, is not just about business or monetary success. There are probably about as many definitions of success as there are people. What is good for the goose is not necessarily good for the gander where success is concerned. But there are some common themes; there are passion, dreams, goals, happiness. Everyone has something that they want to be or do. There is something of a “success” spark in everyone. I hope that these 25 success quotes will inspire you to be all you can be.

(1) “The Pessimist Sees Difficulty In Every Opportunity. The Optimist Sees Opportunity In Every Difficulty.” – Winston Churchill

(2) “It’s Not Whether You Get Knocked Down, It’s Whether You Get Up.” – Inspirational Quote By Vince Lombardi

(3) “We May Encounter Many Defeats But We Must Not Be Defeated.” – Maya Angelou

(4) “Security Is Mostly A Superstition. Life Is Either A Daring Adventure Or Nothing.” – Helen Keller

(5) “A No. 2 pencil and a dream can take you anywhere.” —Joyce Meyer

(6) “There are two types of people who will tell you that you cannot make a difference in this world: those who are afraid to try and those who are afraid you will succeed.”– Ray Goforth

(7) “Would you like me to give you a formula for success? It’s quite simple, really: Double your rate of failure. You are thinking of failure as the enemy of success. But it isn’t at all. You can be discouraged by failure or you can learn from it, so go ahead and make mistakes. Make all you can. Because remember that’s where you will find success.”– Thomas J. Watson

(8) “If you really want to do something, you’ll find a way. If you don’t, you’ll find an excuse.” — Jim Rohn

(9) “Don’t be distracted by criticism. Remember–the only taste of success some people get is to take a bite out of you.” — Zig Ziglar

(10) “I never did anything worth doing by accident, nor did any of my inventions come indirectly through accident, except the phonograph. No, when I have fully decided that a result is worth getting, I go about it, and make trial after trial, until it comes.” – Thomas Edison

(11) “Success isn’t just about what you accomplish in your life; it’s about what you inspire others to do.” – Unknown

(12) “Life is what we make it, always has been, always will be”. – “Grandma” Moses

(13) “A strong positive self-image is the best possible preparation for success”.  -Dr. Joyce Brothers

(14) “I attribute my success to this: I never took nor gave any excuses”. – Florence Nightingale

(15) “I am thankful for all of those who said NO to me. It’s because of them I’m doing it myself.”– Albert Einstein

(16) “In the end, it’s not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away”– Shing Xiong

(17) “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”– Mark Twain

(18) “When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”– Alexander Graham Bell

(19) “Everything you want is out there waiting for you to ask. Everything you want also wants you. But you have to take action to get it.”– Jack Canfield

(20) “Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, or worn. It is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace & gratitude.”– Denis Waitley
(21) “Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.”– Carl Bard
(22) “Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life; define yourself.”– Harvey Fierstein

(23) “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.” Henry Ford

(24) “Develop an attitude of gratitude. Say thank you to everyone you meet for everything they do for you.” Brian Tracy”

(25) “Always do your best. What you plant now, you will harvest later.” Og Mandino

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Diana loves travel, self-improvement, living a debt free life. She also loves hanging out with family, friends and her dog Skye. You can connect with her through livingandstuff.ca

 

 

 

 

 

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How to Have More Confidence With People

Category : Life Tips , Success

Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster. Your life will never be the same again”.
Og Mandino

If we are honest, most of us would say that we lack confidence in some areas of our lives. Sometimes we don’t feel that we are good enough to go after the job position or career that we would like. Maybe we feel that we don’t have the smarts or the ability to do so. We compare ourselves to others who seem to be much better than we are at relating to people and seem to have it together academically. Some of us may prefer to stay at home in our cocoon rather than go out and face people and have to speak with them.

“You can make more friends in two months by becoming really interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you. Which is just another way of saying that the way to make a friend is to be one”.
Dale Carnegie

Some of us dread speaking to others or socializing with them because we are afraid of what people will think of us. There are those of us who are so terrified of speaking with someone of the opposite sex for fear of looking like a fool and being rejected. Lack of confidence can hold us a prisoner of our own mind and prevent us from being all that we can be and doing all the things we would like to do.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others”. – Marianne Williamson

In his book How to Have Confidence and Power in Dealing with People. author Les Giblin deals with this very issue of confidence and explores how to go about developing the confidence we need. The first section of the book is entitled: Making human Nature Work for You and I would like to focus this post on this point.

Les Giblin states that ” one of the big reasons people lack confidence in dealing with others is that they do not understand what they are dealing with”. He adds that ” We are always unsure of ourselves when we are dealing with the unknown”. (p.xxii) The key to success with people is understanding people; not just being able to get along with them. According to the Carnegie Institute of Technology regarding success:

85 percent of success is due to personality factors, to the ability to deal with people successfully”.

More people fail in the job market for a deficit in people skills than competence. More people are fired for their inability to deal with people than for their professional (technical) skills. Most of our “personality” problems are really people problems – our skill in dealing with people. Many people will categorize themselves as shy, timid, reserved, self-conscious or uncomfortable in social situations when, in fact, the reality is a deficit in people skills. People are here to stay; they are not going away. We all have to deal with them whether we want to or not. So it is better to hone the skills and use them to our advantage.

Some Human Nature Basics

There are four “facts of life”, author Les Giblin points out, to know about people:

  • People are all egoists (all of us are).
  • We all care more about ourselves than anything else in the world.
  • All of us want to feel important and “amount to something”.
  • We all crave approval from others so that we can approve of ourselves.

So being egotistic is actually normal even though this trait was scorned in the past and people who were considered self-centered were told to just stop being “like that”. Today we know that our ego helps us to self-preserve. In fact, we cannot be altruistic or sympathetic to others if our basic ego has not been “filled”, so to speak. We must first take care of ourselves. Jesus said to his disciples:

“And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself”

If we are to love our neighbor as ourselves, then it is clear that we must first love ourselves (self-esteem, healthy ego).

Share Freely

We all have human relations potential and so much relational wealth to share. All around us people are starving for the need to feel important and to count. People are famished to be noticed and appreciated. So the fastest way to get better at people skills is to understand what people are looking for and share the goodness. Les Giblin highlights Three ways we can do this.

  1. Be Convinced that Others Are Important

It is a choice of attitude. We simply decide once and for all that everyone, no matter who they are or what they are like or what they do (or don’t do) has importance. Dr. Rhine of Duke University stated:

“Our treatment of people depends on what we think they are, as does our treatment of everything else. No other way would be intelligent. Our feelings for men depend on our ideas, our knowledge about them”.

2. Notice Other People

Generally, we tend to notice only that which is important to us and since people crave being noticed, we are actually paying them a big compliment by noticing them; it makes them feel important. The opposite is also true – when people ignore us (ie: pay more attention to their cellphone, their computer or other activities going on) we tend to feel as if we don’t matter very much to that person.

Les Giblin suggests ” Turning the spotlight on everyone”  and also treating each person as an individual in a group. Even a small amount of attention will be enough to make a person feel like he is important.

3, Don’t Lord It Over People

We all have the need to feel important and this often comes through loud and clear in our conversation. Some of us, in an effort to feel important, prefer a monologue to dialogue and preaching over listening. Whether intentional or not, the fact is, we want to make a good impression. We want people to acknowledge our presence, but the best way to create a good impression is to show another that we are impressed by him.

Opinions and being right don’t really matter much and are not even the point of conversation. We don’t have to win every argument and we don’t need to let people know that they are wrong. When we focus on ourselves being right and correcting others, then we are once again putting ourselves in the limelight and not sharing the goodness.

The Takeaway

Understanding the basic nature of people – the need to feel important, noticed, appreciated and focusing on meeting these needs helps us to take our eyes off ourselves and our insecurities. Most, if not all of our people skills insecurities come because we choose to highlight them and avoid honing the skills that would make social interactions smoother and even more enjoyable. All areas of our lives will benefit from “turning the spotlight” on others.

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Diana Lynne enjoys travel, self-improvement, pursuing a debt-free/financially free life. She also loves hanging out with family, friends and being with her dog Skye. Diana is a Quebec City girl. who loves living life.  You can connect with her through Livingandstuff.ca

 

 

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The Simple Truth Of The Gospel

Category : Uncategorized

Photo credit; Jon Tyson @jontyson -unsplash

Understanding the Gospel

The Gospel is very simple, so simple, in fact, that sometimes it gets overlooked and misunderstood.

God, who is the creator of everything, does not want any of His children to perish because he wants to spend all eternity with them, each one of them.  He is a God of emotions and a God of Love. It hurts him deeply to know that so many don’t want to know him. Like a parent who desires a lifelong relationship with his children, God desires a relationship with everyone.

Why Did Jesus Go to the Cross?

Heaven is a place where sin can not exist. Sin has been in the world since the first rebellion. It is part of our nature and by ourselves; we can not pull ourselves out of it on our own. Jesus who is God in bodily form chose to come to show us who God is, to personally live a human experience and, most importantly, to stand in the gap for us and pay the price, once and for all, for everyone. in doing this, he was stepping in and taking our place. Imagine you are in a courtroom and are justifiably found guilty and sentenced to a life sentence. Then someone, who is not guilty steps in and says that he will take your place and you can go free.

So Jesus went to the cross, took the death penalty that we should all rightfully have and he did this freely and willingly.

What Happened Next?

Jesus died and was buried in a tomb. But at the very moment of his death, the sky turned black and there was an earthquake in the region. All of heaven was shaken.

Jesus did not stay dead. Three days later some of his friends and followers discovered that his tomb was empty. Jesus had risen and conquered death.
No longer would death ever have a grip on him. What does this mean for us?  The Gospel says:

“if you confess with your lips the Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved” (Romans 10:9)

“For everyone who calls on the name of the Lord shall be saved”. (Romans 10:33)

From that time Jesus began to preach and say, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.” (Mathew 4:17)

Jesus died for the sins of the world, my sins, and your sins. So, we must repent of our sins (turn away from them) and choose to follow Jesus, trusting in him through the blood of his sacrifice to save us.

The Gospel tells us how to live eternally with God in Heaven, but as we saw earlier, no sin can exist in heaven. Everything is about choice. We are free to choose our eternal destiny; Heaven or Hell – It’s really up to us. And no decision is, in fact, a decision. Indifference is a decision. So, for those who chose not to believe in and follow Jesus as the only path to heaven: We must repent and turn to him

“I am the Way, the Truth and the Life” – Jesus

The only other option available is Hell. Yes, Hell is a real physical place, just as Heaven is. Both are destinations and places of habitation. Hell, which was reserved for Satan and his demons, is the only place we can go if we reject Jesus.

Here is a prayer that you can say in private to your heavenly Father to set yourself on the path to Eternal Life with God.

Lord Jesus, for so long I’ve kept you out of my life. I know that I am a sinner and that I cannot save myself. I repent of my sins and leave them behind. No longer will I close the door when I hear you knocking. By faith, I thankfully receive your gift of salvation and repent of my sins.. I am ready to trust you as my Lord and Savior. Thank you, Lord Jesus, for coming to earth. I believe you are the Son of God who died on the cross for my sins and rose from the dead on the third day. Thank you for bearing my sins and giving me the gift of eternal life. I believe your words are true. Come into my heart, Lord Jesus, and be my Savior. Amen.

Then, repent of your sins and follow him.

Be blessed today!

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25 Quotes on Making Life Choices

Category : Life Tips , Success

Photo credit: Nathan Dumlao @nate_dumlao -unsplash

Decisions can be tough and emotionally charged. Minor or major consequences are often at stake. Other people can be impacted positively or negatively. Our integrity and courage are called into play. Decisions are most often something we do not like to make. We struggle with the right thing to do, we worry about how we or other people will be affected. We worry about people getting mad at us for our decisions and more times than not, we choose the path of least resistance. No one wants to rock the boat. 
Decisions come with inherent risk. Do I denounce the dishonesty of my co-worker? Do I leave this well-paying job for one I am not sure about yet? Should I marry this person? Should we have one child or several? Should I move to another city or country? Should I confront this person about an issue? Should I confront my boss? There are so many decisions we have to make in life that it can be stressful and overwhelming at times. How can we find our way through the murky waters of decision-making?
Here are some quotes from divers sources to help you in the decsion-making process.

 

(1) “Sometimes it’s the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.” —Keri Russell

(2) “Life presents you with so many decisions. A lot of times, they’re right in front of your face and they’re really difficult, but we must make them.” —Brittany Murphy

(3) “It doesn’t matter which side of the fence you get off on sometimes. What matters most is getting off. You can not make progress without making decisions” —Jim Rohn

(4) “Life is about choices. Some we regret, some we’re proud of. Some will haunt us forever. The message: we are what we chose to be.” —Graham Brown

(5) “We are the creative force of our life, and through our own decisions rather than our conditions, if we carefully learn to do certain things, we can accomplish these goals”. —Stephen Covey

(6) “You are one decision away from a totally different life”. – Anonymous

(7) “You and only you are responsible for your life choices and decisions.” Robert T. Kiyosaki23. 

(8) “Indecision is a decision.” Anonymous

(9) “You cannot change your destination overnight, but you can change direction overnight.” Jim Rohn

(10) “Don’t base your decisions on the advice of those who don’t have to deal with the results.” Anonymous

(11) “The key to making healthy decisions is to respect your future self. Honor him or her, treat him or her like you would treat a friend or a loved one. A Stanford study showed that those who saw a photo of their future self made smarter financial decisions.” A.J. Jacobs

(12) “Decision is a sharp knife that cuts clean and straight; indecision, a dull one that hacks and tears and leaves ragged edges behind it.” – Gordon Graham

(13) “If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you fall into someone else’s plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much.”- Jim Rohn

(14) “Did you know that to worry about a situation you are making a conscious choice to do so?” – Mike C. Adams, How To Stop Worrying and Be Happy

(15) “If you don’t have the information you need to make wise choices, find someone who does.” – Lori Hil, 5 Gifts to Give Yourself

(16) “The risk of a wrong decision is preferable to the terror of indecision.”- Maimonides

(17) “Why do we have to listen to our hearts?  Because, wherever your heart is, that is where you all find your treasure.”– Paulo Coehlo

(18) I believe the single most significant decision I can make on a day-to-day basis is my choice of attitude. Charles Swindoll

(19) Give a solid answer when you accept or decline an offer, making decisions based on your calling, not on what others want of us. Beth Beutler, Time Management, Jesus’ Way

(20) Remember when your dad said, ‘Always sleep on an important decision?’ Some ideas need to marinate. You may not believe it but your mind is still tinkering away at your project at all hours of the day. N.C. Harley, Active Patience

(21) Poor decision making I think, is the number one cause for most of our mistakes. So to make fewer mistakes means to make better decisions, and to make better decisions you must train yourself to think more clearly.’ – Rashard Royster, Mistakes

(22) “Very often, when you change your perspective, you see things differently, make different decisions, and get different results”. – Brian Tracy Get Smart!

(23) “A real decision is measured by the fact that you’ve taken a new action. If there’s no action, you haven’t truly decided.” – Anthony Robbins.

(24) “…the H.A.L.T. method. Never make a decision when you are Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired”. – David Notaris

(25) “All my life, whenever it comes time to make a decision, I make it and forget about it.” – Harry S. Truman

The Takeaway

Life will always be an ongoing process of decision-making; some will be easy and some will be gut-wrenching; some will have a long-lasting impact and some a temporal impact. Being equipped and prepared to help ourselves make effective decisions will go a long way toward making our life path smoother.

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Diana Lynne

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Making Decisions And Life Choices

Category : Life Tips

Photo credit: Jens Lelie @leliejens-unsplash

“It doesn’t matter which side of the fence you get off on sometimes. What matters most is getting off. You cannot make progress without making decisions” – JimRohn

Decisions can be tough and emotionally charged. Minor or major consequences are often at stake. Other people can be impacted positively or negatively. Our integrity and courage are called into play. Decisions are most often something we do not like to make. We struggle with the right thing to do, we worry about how we or other people will be affected. We worry about people getting mad at us for our decisions and more times than not, we choose the path of least resistance. No one wants to rock the boat. 
Decisions come with inherent risk. Do I denounce the dishonesty of my co-worker? Do I leave this well-paying job for one I am not sure about yet? Should I marry this person? Should we have one child or several? Should I move to another city or country? Should I confront this person about an issue? Should I confront my boss? There are so many decisions we have to make in life that it can be stressful and overwhelming at times. How can we find our way through the murky waters of decision-making?
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25 Quotes On Risk Taking

Category : Life Tips

 

photo credit: Micheal Henry @michealhenry -unsplash

Life is risky. Let’s just put that on the table. There is nothing safe about it and none of us are getting out of life alive. Every day, from the minute we step out of bed, and sometimes before, we are taking a risk. Maybe we will sprain an ankle or fall on the floor – not wishing this on anyone, just saying. We never know what each day will bring. We can try to play it safe and not take any risks but in the end, we will always encounter risk. Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better.”

We like safety, but, at the same time, we don’t like being safe for too long. Risk can be adventurous, pump our adrenalin and put us into first gear. It can be thrilling and exhilarating, especially if we have chosen it and prepared well. Safety is okay for a while, but it can get boring and we long for new challenges, something that will take us out of our comfort zone or apathy.  Sometimes we just have to step out of the boat.  Here are some quotes to inspire you to leave the comfort zone.

(1) A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.” – William G.T. Shedd

(2) If you are not willing to risk the unusual, you will have to settle for the ordinary. – Jim Rohn

(3) Life is inherently risky. There is only one big risk you should avoid at all costs, and that is the risk of doing nothing. – Denis Waitley

(4) It is only by risking our persons from one hour to another that we live at all. – William James

(5) People who don’t take risks generally make about two big mistakes a year. People who do take risks generally make about two big mistakes a year. – Peter F. Drucker

(6) Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. – Helen Keller

(7) Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor, catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. – Mark Twain

(8) Play the game for more than you can afford to lose… only then will you learn the game. – Winston Churchill

(9) Why not go out on a limb? Isn’t that where the fruit is? – Frank Scully

(10) I am always doing that which I cannot do, in order that I may learn how to do it.” – Pablo Picasso

(11) Don’t be afraid to take a big step. You can’t cross a chasm in two small jumps.”– David Lloyd George

(12) Do one thing every day that scares you. Eleanor Roosevelt

(13) Do not fear mistakes. There are none. Miles Davis

(14) Remember, a dead fish can float down a stream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream. W.C. Fields

(15) The way to develop self-confidence is to do the thing you fear and get a record of successful experiences behind you. Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.William Jennings Bryan

(16) I can accept failure. Everybody fails at something. But I can’t accept not trying. Fear is an illusion.Michael Jordan

(17) It’s not because things are difficult that we dare not venture. It’s because we dare not venture that they are difficult. Seneca

(18) Life is being on the wire, everything else is just waiting. Karl Wallenda

(19) Never let the odds keep you from doing what you know in your heart you were meant to do. – H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

(20) Nothing will ever be attempted if all possible objections must be first overcome.Samuel Johnson

(21) Never let the odds keep you from doing what you know in your heart you were meant to do.” — H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

(22) Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.”
Helen Keller

(23) It is no secret that the greatest treasures are found in the most remote, inaccessible and difficult places where we must pursue them with great energy and even greater risk. It’s the same with our lives.”
Craig D. Lounsbrough

(24) Those who achieve the extraordinary are usually the most ordinary because they have nothing to prove to anybody. Be Humble.”
Aaron Lauritsen, 100 Days Drive:

(25) If we never take any risks, we’ll never fully experience what life offers to us in its entirety. ― Nina Hrusa

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Diana Lynne

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Would You Do This For You?

Category : Life Tips , Success

“One of the greatest regrets in life is being what others would want you to be, rather than being yourself.”
– Shannon L. Alder

How often do we think of all the things we could do, we would like to do, but then find all sorts of reasons to put them off.  We see that things need to change in our family, at our work, with the friends we socialize with, or maybe there is something that needs to change in our community. Sometimes, we see that a destructive cycle needs to be stopped in a relationship or a municipal decision in our community needs to be overturned. Maybe we just feel that there is something more we can do with our lives.  We want to make a difference and start a change.

Would You Dare to Begin?

Change begins with an idea and often a catalyst event. Something happens that tells us that change needs to happen. It may be that the game-changing event is the proverbial “last straw” or simply a wake-up call to tell us that the ball must start rolling. In the sports world, we see this phenomenon a lot. A team is falling behind and can’t seem to get their act together during the game. Then comes a realization that a new game strategy and an attitude fix are needed to win. A timeout and a solid talk from the coach or captain whips the team into shape and the team comes out ready to tackle the world.

It may be that you are sick and tired of being sick and tired of the same old, same old. Maybe you are tired of life passing you by while you watch it go by from the front porch. Maybe you just need that push to get you started. Maybe you are beginning to realize that that dream, that idea is possible after all. If others can do what they dream of doing, why not you? Maybe it is your turn to shine. Maybe it is time for you to stand up and do something you ahve always felt called to do.

Do You Believe?

A single idea can blossom into something so much bigger than you imagined. As an example, I began this blog on the wing of an idea. I have been doing it for 5 months already and it all began with the question “Can I really do it?”  I had all sorts of doubts in my mind. I wondered if people would even care about what I write. Blogging is an activity that takes a lot of time and I put my heart into each post. But I am willing to trust the process and believe that i can do it and i can make a difference.

Would You Trust the Process?

And what is the process? It’s a chain of events that can bring someone from the point of  “dragging their feet” to eventually getting results doing what they have always wanted to do. It is about being consistant, being present, day after day and having the faith to carry it through in the face of obstacles  and disappointment. The process is:

A catalyst event that leads to a change in attitude, which leads to a change in behavior, which leads to a change in performance, which ultimately leads to a change in results.

We all have events that happen in our life that we might call game-changers: events that cause our life to take a sudden turn in the road and go a different direction (good or bad), but what we do with these events – how we handle them can make all the difference. We can just sail along with them -or sink with them or we can use them to our advantage. We can capitalize on them. In my case, I was looking for something creative, something that I could personally bring to the table .

So how do we turn these events, these momentous points of decision into action? How can we capitalize on them to bring about a positive change? What is that key that will be the difference between whether our idea, and the catalyst that fermented it, stays in our head or whether it will blossom into something much bigger and more beautiful?

Would You Trust Your “Why”?

It is rae that we will begin anything without having a reason why. Our “why” is the most important element in anything we undertake. We need to ask ourselves why we want to change. What is the driving force behind the idea? Are we tired of how things are going in our relationships? Do we believe that we can change our work situation or get on a better career path? Do we want to make some changes in our community that are long overdue?  Do we see that we can make an impact somewhere? Do we finally want to step out and follow that dream we have been carrying around inside?

Let’s face it. We were not born to be fish floating with the downstream current. We are certainly not here to figure out how to die safely. What is it that we want to to do to make an impact in our life? Where are we going and who do we want to be? What greater purpose has been bubbling up inside of us? When we latch on to this purpose, this idea, it will lead to:

Could You See Things Differently?

No longer do we have to listen to or accept all the negative that has been pumped into our brain for most of our lives. We don’t even have to listen to ourselves. We can turn down and turn off that voice and tune into a positive voice and mindset. Believe me, there are days when I wonder if I am writing to anybody or if all my readers are imaginary. Anything worthwhile will come with its share of discouragement. Doubt, discouragement, and questions are part of the process but, in the end:

We are either the captains or the captives of our own thoughts.

We have around 50,000 thoughts a day and they are the only thing that we really have any control over. Our thoughts can either make us or break us. Ultimately we have three choices in life:

  • Give up
  • Give in
  • Give it all we’ve got

It all comes down to our attitude and our ability to reframe our reality. A gamechanger in life can get us down or we can rise above it. It all depends on how we are able to reframe it and use it to our advantage.

Could You Take That Step?

To gain momentum we need action. Like in physics, an object at rest tends to stay at rest and an object in motion tends to stay in motion. In other words, we need to get the ball rolling to see results.

The thought of acting on our ideas of making changes can grip us with fear. We may be fearful of what others may say about us. Will they try to discourage us or belittle our idea? Will they be antagonistic? In reality, most people are not even thinking about us because they are too focused on themselves.

We may be afraid of losing what we have gained or worked hard to attain. We spend our time counting all of our chickens rather than think about taking a risk. But changing things will involve risk. If we want results in an area, we have to be willing to give up our comfort.

Maybe we are afraid of failure. Don’t worry, failure is a stepping stone to success. If we try to avoid failure, we will just be hurting ourselves:

  • Quit thinking about it and do it!
  • Quit talking about it and do it!
  • Quit waiting for the perfect time and do it!
  • Quit trying to make it fair and do it!

Do You Have the Courage?

Stuff happens! Life happens! Gut shots happen! They happen to all of us. We are going along and feel like our act is together and then BAM! Life hits us smack in the face. Now we hit a fork in the road and have to decide which path to take. It happens to the best of us. No one is immune from adversity. It all depends on how we handle it.

So how do we handle these hits? Well, Rocky Balboa has some wisdom on this:

It’s not how hard you can hit that makes you successful; it’s how hard you can get hit, get back up and keep moving forward that counts.

Life isn’t fair – we have all heard that many times. We just need to expect the gut shots in life, take them and rise above them. These shots can cause momentum in one of two ways; either a downward spiral momentum or an upward climb momentum. It’s really up to us where we want to go.

Would You Reach Out?

Having others on board with you will energize your idea and give it some push. whatever it is you are working to do or change, having a team will be a boost. So, how do you get them on board? For example, in a family, how do you get everyone involved in managing the household chores?

Enthusiasm! Get excited about it. sometimes just seeing someone’s excitement is enough to motivate action even if they don’t know what is going on. Enthusiasm is contagious. Have a vision and get excited about it. Be up when things are up and up when things are down.

Encouragement! Highlight their strong points. What is it that you see in them that makes the special and unique and how would this make them great team members?

Edify! Become a good finder in others. Even if it is hard to find something good, find it anyway.

Get your team together and get them on board!

Margaret Mead said ( of a group effort):

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.

Could You Keep Your Eye On the Horizon?

They go hand in hand. We need to show up. We need to do it. We need to do it consistently and give it all we’ve got. We need to never give up and never give in. We need to get through the valleys of life, learn the lessons of the valleys and start climbing out. That is our performance – staying in the game, continuing no matter what. And the results will be there. They are what make the struggle, the persistence worth it.

And here’s the deal – If we don’t take the first step, if we we don’t decide to step out and get a little messy, well we will just stay clean. But we may miss out on the adventure of our life.

The Takeaway

Everything begins with an idea. Sometimes the idea comes as a result of catalysts – game changers in our life. Sometimes we just need to make some changes and get the ball rolling. It won’t happen if we don’t begin. We need to put the gears into action and pick up speed if we want the results we are looking for. A snowball will gather speed as it rolls downhill, picking more snow as it goes. In the same way, we can give our ideas the first push, but gathering a team will help it gain momentum.

Have a great day!

Read Also

We Don’t Have All the Time in the World

The Seeds of Possibility

Overcoming Fear and Leaving the Comfort Zone

5 Ways We Block Our Success

The 10 “Must Do” Things for Success

The Fight of Our Life

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Diana Lynne’s passions are family, travel, self-improvement, pursuing a debt-free/financially free life. She also loves hanging out with family, friends and being with her dog Skye. Diana is a Quebec City girl. who loves living life.  You can connect with her through Livingandstuff.ca

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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25 Quotes on Forgiveness

Category : Life Tips

 

photo credit: Melody Jacobs @melodyjacobs1 -unsplash

Who has not heard the words “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me”?  We all know that words hurt just as much as sticks and stones of often much more and for much longer. In fact, words are usually at the forefront of offense and unforgiveness (resentment, grudges, retaliation). It has been said that holding onto unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.

We know all of this, don’t we? So why is it so hard for us to forgive and move on?   Why do we let what people do to us affect us so much and often?  In the hopes of addressing unforgiveness, here are 25 quotes on the subject of forgiveness.

(1) “Forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart.”
– Corrie Ten Boom

(2)“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”
– Mahatma Gandhi

(3) “When you forgive, you in no way change the past — but you sure do change the future.”
– Bernard Meltzer

(4) Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.”
– Nelson Mandela

(5) “Forgiveness is not a feeling; it is a commitment. It is a choice to show mercy, not to hold the offense up against the offender. Forgiveness is an expression of love.”
– Gary Chapman

(6) “I have always found that mercy bears richer fruits than strict justice.”
– Abraham Lincoln

(7) You will never forgive anyone more than God has already forgiven you.”  – Max Lucado

(8) “Mistakes are always forgivable if one has the courage to admit them.”
– Bruce Lee

(9) “Any good apology has 3 parts: 1) I’m sorry; 2) It’s my fault; 3) What can I do to make it right? Most people forget the third part.”
– Unknown

(10) “Certainly, people make mistakes in their life. I’m no different, I’ve made mistakes. When people mess up, forgive them. When I mess up, I ask for forgiveness.”
– Michele Bachmann

(12) “Only the brave know how to forgive. … A coward never forgave; it is not in his nature.” – Laurence Sterne

(13) “As long as you don’t forgive, who and whatever it is will occupy a rent-free space in your mind.” – Isabelle Holland

(14) “Forgive all who have offended you, not for them, but for yourself.” – Harriet Nelson

(15) “When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.” – Katherine Ponder

(16) “A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers.” – Robert Quillen

(17) “Sincere forgiveness isn’t colored with expectations that the other person apologizes or changes. Don’t worry whether or not they finally understand you. Love them and release them. Life feeds back truth to people in its own way and time-just like it does for you and me.” – Sara Paddison

(18) To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you”.

— Lewis B. Smedes

(19) “The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget”.— Thomas Szasz

(20) “I think the first step is to understand that forgiveness does not exonerate the perpetrator. Forgiveness liberates the victim. It’s a gift you give yourself.”

— T. D. Jakes

(21) “Without forgiveness life is governed by an endless cycle of resentment and retaliation”.— Roberto Assagioli

(22) “The remedy for life’s broken pieces is not classes, workshops or books. Don’t try to heal the broken pieces. Just forgive”.

— Iyanla Vanzant

(23) “Forgiveness is the remission of sins. For it is by this that what has been lost, and was found, is saved from being lost again.”

— Saint Augustine

(24) “Forgive, forget. Bear with the faults of others as you would have them bear with yours.”

— Phillips Brooks

(25) “When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free”.

— Katherine Ponder

The Takeaway

People are always going to do and say things that hurt others whether intentionally or unintentionally. It is what it is. We do not have to sing Kumbaya with everyone, but we can choose to forgive and, indeed, we must learn to forgive for our own sake, for our own freedom. It is simply a choice to no longer be a captive to hurt.

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Diana Lynne’s passions are family, travel, self-improvement, pursuing a debt-free/financially free life. She also loves hanging out with family, friends and being with her dog Skye. Diana is a Quebec City girl. who loves living life.  You can connect with her through Livingandstuff.ca

 

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The Heart of Forgiveness

Category : Uncategorized

 

Photo credit: Lina Trochez@imtrochezz – unspash

“Holding a grudge is like letting someone live rent-free inside your head”.

Who has not heard the words “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me”?  We all know that words hurt just as much as sticks and stones of often much more and for much longer. In fact, words are usually at the forefront of offense and unforgiveness (resentment, grudges, retaliation). It has been said that holding onto unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. The grudge holder is only hurting himself.

We know all of this, don’t we? So why is it so hard for us to forgive and move on?   Why do we let what people do to us affect us so much and often to the point that we view them as enemies? We will get to this a little later on. First of all, let’s get a visual of what unforgiveness is and what it can look like.  In a talk given by Bill Lewis (not the comedian), a leadership speaker, unforgiveness can be compared to a big burlap bag that we carry over our shoulder. Each offense that we do not let go of (that we don’t forgive) is a rock that we put into the bag. Over the course of time, more an more rocks go into the bag which gets heavier and heavier until it is hard to bear.

Forgiveness is, if we continue with the analogy, the act of taking rocks out of our bag to lighten our load. It is the act of canceling any guilt or obligation that someone has towards us and releasing ourselves from carrying the load. Forgiveness is also a singular act. It requires no action on the part of the person being forgiven; it is a choice we make. So why do we have so much trouble forgiving – after all, it looks straightforward. The reason is that we have misconceptions about what forgiveness is.

The greatest authority on forgiveness writes this:

“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you”. Ephesians 4:32

Hindrances to Forgiveness

Forgiveness can often feel like an impossible barrier to get over. It may feel like the other person doesn’t deserve to be forgiven. The offense may have cause s0 much pain that we may not even feel that we have the emotional energy to forgive. There are three main reasons why people resist forgiving someone who has hurt them or taken something from them.

(1) Not ready to Forgive

We may not feel ready to take this step. Perhaps we are still working through and trying to make sense of the pain and hurt feelings we experience. In many cases, the feelings and the hurt may just be too raw.

(2) Self-preservation

We may also not wish to forgive because we somehow fear that it will make us vulnerable to more hurt. We might be afraid that we have to protect our broken feelings, our emotional health, and even physical integrity.

(3) Fear of Reactions

Another fear is that of how the other person will respond to us or view us. Perhaps they will see us as weak or a “carpet” they can step on. Maybe we feel that our forgiveness will not change anything in their behavior so it is not worth doing.

These obstacles to forgiving result largely from misconceptions of what forgiveness really means and represents. In our heads, we tend to think we are somehow doing the other person a favor or that we are excusing their behavior toward us. Many often equate forgiveness with reconciliation and expect that it will make the situation all better. Let’s look at what forgiveness is not.

What Forgiveness Is Not

(1) Forgiveness is not natural to us.

(2) Forgiveness is not reconciliation. Forgiveness is a singular act (one person’s choice) and it does not require you to fix the situation. It does not even require you to reconcile with the person.

(3) Forgiveness is not a feeling or even based on feelings. It is simply a choice.

(4) Forgiveness is not about excusing the wrong, being a carpet or letting the person get away with something.

(5) Forgiveness is not a sign of weakness, but a sign of strength.

(6) Forgiveness is not about fair or not fair. In fact, it has nothing to do with fairness.

Unforgiveness does not always look the same from person to person. It can be quite complex and masked under behaviors that are more (or less) socially acceptable in the sense that they have come to be seen as natural and normal and even justifiable.

The 4 R’s (Faces) of Unforgiveness

“To forgive is to set a prisoner free, and realize the prisoner was you.” Anonymous

There are typically four ways we dig in our heals in response to being somehow wronged in one way or another.

(1) Retaliation

Retaliation is an aggressive way to deal with being wronged. People who chose this path want to get even or show the person who hurt them how it feels. they want to give them a taste of their own medicine, so to speak. “I’m going to show you”, they may say, “Just wait and see”.

The problem with retaliation is that in fact, we are bringing ourselves down to their level of offense, becoming what we said we hate. It is a lose-lose situation. Furthermore, we risk losing credibility and even doing something we may regret later when our emotions have calmed down.

(2) Restitution

This attitude requires the person to pay back (with interest) for what they have done. For example, they might demand an apology and in extreme cases take the person to court (reality TV is full of these kinds of scenarios).

The problem with this reaction is that, no matter how much the person apologizes or pays up in court, it can never restore a relationship. There are simply not enough apologies that can be made or enough money that can be given that will fix what is broken.

(3) Resentment

The person who chooses this form of unforgiveness holds onto a grudge, sometimes for years. He or she chooses to harden their heart toward the offender in a twisted notion that they are somehow punishing the offender by holding the grudge as if, somehow justice has been served in this way.

(4) Reservation

Finally, some people choose to cut people off and out of their lives. They unfriend them on Facebook, they block them on their phone and basically pretend that they don’t exist, that they are no longer on the planet. They no longer have access to us.

This reaction festers inside us, making us bitter. If we allow resentment to linger and grow, it will ignite negative emotions, stress and, of course, lead to illness. In fact, resentment poisons us inside and does nothing to the person who wronged us. The question we need to ask here is not ” Was I wronged”?, but “what am I doing to myself”?

“Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself.” Tony Robbins

The Stages of Forgiveness

Yes, there are stages; it is a process. There is a misconception that forgiveness is supposed to be instantaneous and then everyone can sing  “sing Kumbaya” together. Not exactly.

(1) Face the offense

Rather than mentally blocking it out, pushing it under the carpet or denying it (and maybe blaming ourselves), we need to acknowledge that harm was done. We need to take the time we need to think through the offense. This does not mean play it over like a movie in our head and exaggerating the scenes or changing the script. What we should be doing is think through the situation and even try to look at it through the lens of the offending party.

(2) Feel the Offense

Determine exactly what you feel or how you were feeling. Identify the feelings you experienced. Remember that feelings are transitory. Ask if you were actually feeling one way or another or if you felt you had the right to feel that way based on the offense. Separate the feelings from the facts.

(3) Forgive the Offender

It is time to step up to bat and decide to forgive. In doing so, you will take the stress off your shoulders and liberate yourself from negative emotions and stress.

“To err is human, to forgive is divine”.

(4) Further Action

At this point, you can decide if reconciliation and restoration of the relationship are possible or even necessary. Forgiveness frees you of your responsibility, but reconciliation will require both parties to desire to move forward together.

Back To The Burlap Bag

We saw earlier, that holding on to hurts and unforgiveness is like carrying around a burlap bag filled with an accumulation of stones (hurts). Pain and hurt feelings are what keep us from letting go and figuratively taking out the stones from the bag to lighten the load. Our feelings will almost always get us in trouble if we depend on them. They are irrational and never give us a clear, accurate picture – they are just too subjective.

And what do we often do when we have experienced hurt? We rush to one of our good friends or confidant (who is probably carrying his own bag of stones). They listen to us, sympathize with us and puff up our side of the story – “He said what”? “Oh my goodness! That”s terrible”! And soon the rocks in our burlap sack have become boulders and we are no further ahead to resolving the problem. In fact, the problem is probably worse now.

We Need Perspective

We need to talk to a “stone remover” – someone who knows how to help us think clearly through the problem.  What we need is strategies and perspectives, not someone who will only parrot our feelings and build them up so that the situation becomes worse than it was before. We need someone to help us deal with the situation and not discredit the person who offended us. Having someone else to help us see the situation from the outside and in a larger scope can be very useful in helping us to see our situation with clarity.

The Takeaway

The fact is people are always going to do and say things that hurt others whether intentionally or unintentionally. It is what it is. We do not have to sing Kumbaya with everyone, but we can choose to forgive and, indeed, we must learn to forgive for our own sake, for our own freedom. Forgiveness has nothing to do with feelings. it is simply a choice to no longer be a captive to hurt. It means that the offense no longer has a hold on us and we can move on.

Related Posts

The Why and How of Happiness

How to Deal with Difficult People

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What Is the Happiness Factor

Diana Lynne’s passions are family, travel, self-improvement, pursuing a debt-free/financially free life. She also loves hanging out with family, friends and being with her dog Skye. Diana is a Quebec City girl. who loves living life.  You can connect with her through Livingandstuff.ca

 

 

 

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